I am a news and Blog junkie, so I read a lot and am generally capable of reciting useless facts at a moment's notice. My wife calls me "Pez", because she equates my capacity for my inane ramblings to a Pez candy dispenser. I'll bring up a subject and she'll just hold up her hand, make a clicking sound with her tongue and depress her thumb on an invisible Pez dispenser. Another Pez moment has come and gone.

Recently, I was talking with her about a very witty guy I'd read about named Brian Sack. He's an actor/writer who has a keen sense of humor. Anyway, Brian made a statement during an interview with another sharply witty guy (Joe Lawson - the creator of the now infamous "Tiny House" reality-TV spoof ad for Geico).

"Probably due to the preponderance of hacks in it, the advertising industry has been known to seize on a theme and do it to death."

He could just have easily have been talking about churches! And here, sort of drifting onto the thread topic, is where I had the thought that churches should wholly avoid another "Living Christmas Tree".

I mean, how hard is it to stack up a bunch of choir members, surround them with dangerous levels of electricity and have them sing a medley of songs? (When I put it that way, it could actually end up being quite entertaining with the right amount of voltage. But I digress.)

Instead, we end up watching as little lights follow the same three chase patterns around and around, up and down the choir-shaped-like-a-pointy-Christmas-tree. And no amount of moving lights and fog can overcome this inherently goofy and uninspiring scenario.

Where's the originality? Where's the inventiveness? Where's the entertainment value? Where's the relevance?

Therefore, I've unofficially declared a ban on all Living Christmas Trees from now on. Be sure to pass this link on to your friends at other churches, as they really need to hear this.

Henceforth, churches need to find ways of singing and presenting the Gospel to our friends and family that actually allows us to invite them to something other than an electrified, pointy-shaped choir. Failure to do so will not only be breaking my unofficial rule, but worse, will continue to cater to the already-convinced crowd that doesn't care about bringing their unchurched/dechurched friends and family to hear about the real news and meaning of Christmas.

I know, it's still October and I've become the guy I despise - you know, the one who starts talking about Christmas before Halloween has even come and gone. But my conscience knows that if I don't head this one off early, the excuse could be "well, that's fine and all, but we don't have time to change it now." So in order to beat those naysayers to the punch, here's your early wake-up call: Get relevant and ban Living Christmas Trees.